FORKS


 I

How can I explain what happened?
He was there
and i was there
And here is this page
and here is my heart
Pulsing, pumping to the rhythm of a Yes' song
 
He was there
and I was there
And my heart was there with all its
complexity, history and questions
And that false notion of myself
And its pure fire 
 
burning
 
And she was there, too
doing something with her fingers
Strumming harmonies I didn't know before
roaring in silence
 
and she had been there
insisting:
Write with fire! Fill the page! It's going to be good for you!
 
And it is
 
So here I am
And I was there a while ago
And it was there yesterday and before that and always
 
Singing this not very lady-like melody
about this lake and the people I love
about my complex, full, contradictory, unique and tenacious
heart
 
shouting love
 
How can I explain what happened on this page?
with these words?
 
Can you hear the music?
The guitar
The drums
The electric piano of the 60's
My straight hair blowing free in the wind of this wild stage of life?
 
There was a lion and the stars
our hearts full of fire, faith, mysticism
and other usual, sad things
 
All that
 
We don't burn 
 
And he was there, and she
And her
initiators
inspiring Rock and Roll moves
remembering  the songs that are still alive within us
in the folds of our memories
 
we were there
together
humans
panthers, tigers, jaguars, lions
 
And here is this page
to showcase the experiences of our bodies, minds and hearts:
To explode, to fill 
To let our truths be born like supernovae
to record this unique and ever changing feeling of
be wild and free
that we have today and yesterday and the day before
 
How can I explain this?
 
How can I explain what happened?
 
I was there
He was there

We were all there


II
 
What do you want to do with this?
 
That was his question:
that was what he asked me
when I asked him
 
    Are these dreams that I have
    journeys of my soul
    or mere projections of my consciousness?
 
and he said:
The answer isYes
 
Yes
 
The answer is Yes,
which is the name of Barbara's favorite Rock and Roll band
 
Which is the same response I got from my
own, rare, dreams
 
But what terrified me inside
what let me burning inside
was the question that followed:
 
What do you want to do with it?

 
I've never been asked that before


 
Play-doh said Barbara
 
Yeah.
 
Yes,
 
play-doh
 
What do I want to create with this colored clay for children?
 
I have: strange dreams that give me answers,
a soundtrack,
a group of people that I love
 
What is it that can be desired?
 
What?



III
 
 
You had to say yes to yourself
He told me
and I did
 
I had done it
 
You couldn't keep waiting for someone else's Yes
he said
 
and I agreed
 
Your family, your partners
They had parts of that Yes
But now it's all yours
he said
and
 
Yes
 
It is now
 
My yes it's only mine
 
A yes that beats in my heart
Like a rock and roll song
Like a rainbow:
As the full range of possibilities of life
 
Yes
 
my unique life
 
that sings inside of me
A song of mysticism and honesty
About the relationship between a moth
The fire
And the moon
 
Yes
 
For the Yes and for the No
 
Yes
 
Only yes
 
always yes


 
This is a door.


Epilogue of YES:

we
injured animals
hide in the caves
of the simplistic
questions

when we can't see
the
vastness and emptiness
that sorruond us

begins

on time

our puppet show
around the fire:

Our personal myth  of the Cave